People with low self-esteem rarely live their life to the full. They distance themselves from others, and are thus denied their love and support. They rarely, if ever, make full use of their abilities. Instead, they end up brooding about the injustices of life. Such people are a loss to themselves, their family and to society. Some of them even take to crime, alcohol and drugs.
Invariably, people with low self-esteem are uncomfortable with success. They tend to believe that they don’t deserve success, and they have no clue as to how to savor success. At the same time, they do not hesitate to blame themselves if things go wrong. They take sadistic pleasure in telling the world that they knew things would go wrong. This is an important symptom of low self-esteem, and needs to be treated at the earliest.
People suffering from low self-esteem also have the habit of putting themselves down. They repeatedly tell themselves that they are not good enough and that they are bound to fail. Over a period of time this negative self-talk turns into a negative self-belief. More than that, they try and implant these seeds of negativity in people around them. They also gravitate towards people who suffer from similar problems. The end result is that they feed on each other’s negativity, and become much poorer individuals than they initially were.
A high level of dissatisfaction is another indicator of low self-esteem. There are people who spend all their time complaining. They neither see a positive thing in others nor in themselves. This cynicism eats away their self-belief, and erodes their self-confidence. In contrast, people who value their abilities enjoy high self-esteem.
Also, people with low self-esteem spend most of their time brooding about the past and worrying about the future. They don’t spend enough time living in the present. As a result, they don’t enjoy the present, even though it may be full of success. The net result is that they prevent themselves from enjoying life, and make themselves unhappy. It finally becomes a vicious cycle that feeds upon itself, and prevents them from breaking out of their negative mould
Such people are rarely relaxed and at ease. They keep looking for different jobs and lines of work. The reason why they are always looking for something else to do is that they are lack self-confidence. They drift from one crisis to another, and blame fate for their woes.
A few of them take to alcohol, drugs, food, sex etc to get a temporary “high”. But this rarely helps them in the long run. They fail to generate a sustainable feeling of happiness and contentment.
People with low self-esteem also have problems getting close to others. They are not comfortable with intimacy and create barriers to prevent people from coming close to them. They don’t like to open up to people and to reveal their innermost thoughts. They may be nursing some old bad experience with someone who caused them a lot of pain or who let them down when they were most vulnerable. By forcing themselves to live in a world of self-denial they are doing a great damage to themselves. They fail to benefit from the company of others, and keep entrenching themselves deeper and deeper into their negative world. They may ultimately reach a stage where they may be declared beyond salvage.
But this is not good for society. People with low self-esteem must be helped. Their symptoms must be diagnosed, and help provided if they have to be turned into useful members of society. This help can be given by family members, friends, teachers or by trained psychologists.
Saturday, March 17, 2012
Building Your Self-Confidence at Work
Many people wish they felt more secure about their abilities on the job. In other words, they're looking for increased self-confidence when it comes to performing the work, dealing with coworkers, and handling tough situations. If you're one of these people, you're not alone. What can you do to feel more self-assured about your job?
First, remember that you are not your job. That is, if you make a mistake at work, this does not mean that you are stupid, worthless, or that you're in the wrong position. It's all too easy to take mistakes personally, seeing them as a reflection of your true person rather than for what it is: a mistake. Even though it may not always appear so, everyone makes mistakes from time to time. The best way to deal with a mistake is to own up to it right away and present a solution. This shows that you are honest, and by presenting ways to fix the problem, your boss can send you on your way to deal with the issue. Acting honestly and straightforwardly is best for you--you'll feel better about yourself--and best for the company (which again will help you feel better).
Another common issue is feeling insecure when it comes to coworkers. Many people feel that they do not fit in, are unsure how to handle conflict, or have an overbearing coworker or boss that they don't know how to communicate with. Any of these feelings can wear at your self-esteem. You may feel you have nothing to offer the group, whether socially or on projects, you avoid conflict, and may allow others to step on you. If socialization is a problem, it will require you to step out of your comfort zone a bit. This does not mean you need to jump right in with a large company gathering; rather, take it slow by opening conversations with one or two coworkers. Chances are you'll have something in common. Asking questions about the other person is always a great way to go; just avoid questions with simple yes or no answers.
When dealing with conflict resolution and difficult employees, learning some proven communication techniques may be necessary. Consider attending a course on conflict resolution and dealing with difficult people. In the meantime, remember that the overbearing person likely has a lot of insecurities as well, and these are what cause the behavior. In the midst of conflict, do your best to avoid being pulled into argumentative situations. Don't reward the other person's behavior by getting upset or immediately backing down. If necessary, say you'll continue the conversation when everyone has had a chance to cool down. Dealing with negative coworkers is never fun. Try and remember that your self worth is not dependent on the coworker's approval, even if that person is your boss.
It could be you're feeling unsure about your skills. This one is pretty easy--learn more! Many companies offer continuing education options, will pay for schooling, or offer professional development in house. Whatever your employer offers, take advantage. If your company does not have this option, find some good books on the subject. Ask your colleagues for suggestions, or if you're a member of any type of professional group, seek advice there as well. Many of your peers will have good suggestions on what's worth looking into.
Finally, give yourself some challenges. One great way to build your self confidence at work is to take on a special project or extra work. If you choose something you feel passionate about or something in your specialty area, you can show yourself and your colleagues that you are able to produce results. Even if you fail, you're showing initiative and willingness by taking on special projects. Knowing that you put yourself out there, rather than sitting on the sidelines, can be a great confidence booster. And the same can be said for when it goes well.
First, remember that you are not your job. That is, if you make a mistake at work, this does not mean that you are stupid, worthless, or that you're in the wrong position. It's all too easy to take mistakes personally, seeing them as a reflection of your true person rather than for what it is: a mistake. Even though it may not always appear so, everyone makes mistakes from time to time. The best way to deal with a mistake is to own up to it right away and present a solution. This shows that you are honest, and by presenting ways to fix the problem, your boss can send you on your way to deal with the issue. Acting honestly and straightforwardly is best for you--you'll feel better about yourself--and best for the company (which again will help you feel better).
Another common issue is feeling insecure when it comes to coworkers. Many people feel that they do not fit in, are unsure how to handle conflict, or have an overbearing coworker or boss that they don't know how to communicate with. Any of these feelings can wear at your self-esteem. You may feel you have nothing to offer the group, whether socially or on projects, you avoid conflict, and may allow others to step on you. If socialization is a problem, it will require you to step out of your comfort zone a bit. This does not mean you need to jump right in with a large company gathering; rather, take it slow by opening conversations with one or two coworkers. Chances are you'll have something in common. Asking questions about the other person is always a great way to go; just avoid questions with simple yes or no answers.
When dealing with conflict resolution and difficult employees, learning some proven communication techniques may be necessary. Consider attending a course on conflict resolution and dealing with difficult people. In the meantime, remember that the overbearing person likely has a lot of insecurities as well, and these are what cause the behavior. In the midst of conflict, do your best to avoid being pulled into argumentative situations. Don't reward the other person's behavior by getting upset or immediately backing down. If necessary, say you'll continue the conversation when everyone has had a chance to cool down. Dealing with negative coworkers is never fun. Try and remember that your self worth is not dependent on the coworker's approval, even if that person is your boss.
It could be you're feeling unsure about your skills. This one is pretty easy--learn more! Many companies offer continuing education options, will pay for schooling, or offer professional development in house. Whatever your employer offers, take advantage. If your company does not have this option, find some good books on the subject. Ask your colleagues for suggestions, or if you're a member of any type of professional group, seek advice there as well. Many of your peers will have good suggestions on what's worth looking into.
Finally, give yourself some challenges. One great way to build your self confidence at work is to take on a special project or extra work. If you choose something you feel passionate about or something in your specialty area, you can show yourself and your colleagues that you are able to produce results. Even if you fail, you're showing initiative and willingness by taking on special projects. Knowing that you put yourself out there, rather than sitting on the sidelines, can be a great confidence booster. And the same can be said for when it goes well.
Self Esteem for Women
Women are remarkably strong individuals who have the capability to battle with demons and conquer the world, but more often than not, it is their own self confidence that brings them down. That nagging voice in the back of your head that questions your actions, criticizes you looks, and doubts your self worth can bring any woman—no matter how successful or powerful—to her knees. Instead of falling prey to low self esteem, do something about it! Strive to break the cycle of feeling poorly about yourself, not doing anything about it, and then feeling worse.
Sadly, a major problem with the self esteem of women is the opinions of other women. Instead of fully supporting, complimenting, and boosting another women’s spirits, women can be mean spirited. Back biting, gossiping, and cruel remarks seem to run rampant with women friends, family, and colleagues. If you find yourself in a situation with another woman that is detrimental to your own sense of self worth and self esteem, find a way to resolve the situation. Perhaps all it will take is speaking your feelings to a friend who is saying hurtful things or to a coworker who always points out the negative aspects of your work. Quite often, these individuals suffer from low self esteem and use a defensive or derisive attitude in order to compensate. Be mindful of this behavior next time your friends, family, or coworkers are discussing another woman and be careful not to fall into the negative mindset. By setting a good example, you will influence others in addition to helping your own self esteem.
The majority of all women have some sort of issues with their body or physical appearance. Regardless how beautiful a woman is, there is always a voice is dissent regarding one or more physical attribute. Even the women society deems beautiful have issues with their bodies, which is often spotlighted in the media. World famous models and actresses agonize over their weight, height, or looks just like every other woman on the face of the earth. Instead of looking at yourself in a harsh, negative light, turn your attitude around. Think about your positive attributes instead of ones you wish you could change. Use these positive attributes to your advantage. Instead of wishing you could wear certain types of clothing, embrace the styles that fit and flatter your body. Self esteem is one of the best things any woman can possess and it makes her look better in the eyes of everyone else.
Do not fall into the trap of thinking material items can make you feel better about yourself. Quite often, women tend to indulge themselves on extravagant or expensive items that they believe will boost their self esteem. A designer pair of shoes or expensive purse will not fix what is wrong on the inside. No matter what you purchase, that shopping spree you just indulged on will most likely cause yourself greater self esteem woes. It is a vicious cycle, feeling poorly about yourself, making outrageous purchases, then feeling even worse about yourself due to the surmounting bills and needless items. Instead of heading to your local mall, hit the library and check out the self-help section. You may find a book that has a great starting point for boosting your self esteem. Money cannot buy you love or happiness, so why should you think it can buy you self esteem?
Keep a positive outlook on life and you will lead a positive life. Break away from negative influences and work to surround yourself with positive individuals who will positively influence your life. You are a great person—every one you know feels that way and its time you should as well.
Sadly, a major problem with the self esteem of women is the opinions of other women. Instead of fully supporting, complimenting, and boosting another women’s spirits, women can be mean spirited. Back biting, gossiping, and cruel remarks seem to run rampant with women friends, family, and colleagues. If you find yourself in a situation with another woman that is detrimental to your own sense of self worth and self esteem, find a way to resolve the situation. Perhaps all it will take is speaking your feelings to a friend who is saying hurtful things or to a coworker who always points out the negative aspects of your work. Quite often, these individuals suffer from low self esteem and use a defensive or derisive attitude in order to compensate. Be mindful of this behavior next time your friends, family, or coworkers are discussing another woman and be careful not to fall into the negative mindset. By setting a good example, you will influence others in addition to helping your own self esteem.
The majority of all women have some sort of issues with their body or physical appearance. Regardless how beautiful a woman is, there is always a voice is dissent regarding one or more physical attribute. Even the women society deems beautiful have issues with their bodies, which is often spotlighted in the media. World famous models and actresses agonize over their weight, height, or looks just like every other woman on the face of the earth. Instead of looking at yourself in a harsh, negative light, turn your attitude around. Think about your positive attributes instead of ones you wish you could change. Use these positive attributes to your advantage. Instead of wishing you could wear certain types of clothing, embrace the styles that fit and flatter your body. Self esteem is one of the best things any woman can possess and it makes her look better in the eyes of everyone else.
Do not fall into the trap of thinking material items can make you feel better about yourself. Quite often, women tend to indulge themselves on extravagant or expensive items that they believe will boost their self esteem. A designer pair of shoes or expensive purse will not fix what is wrong on the inside. No matter what you purchase, that shopping spree you just indulged on will most likely cause yourself greater self esteem woes. It is a vicious cycle, feeling poorly about yourself, making outrageous purchases, then feeling even worse about yourself due to the surmounting bills and needless items. Instead of heading to your local mall, hit the library and check out the self-help section. You may find a book that has a great starting point for boosting your self esteem. Money cannot buy you love or happiness, so why should you think it can buy you self esteem?
Keep a positive outlook on life and you will lead a positive life. Break away from negative influences and work to surround yourself with positive individuals who will positively influence your life. You are a great person—every one you know feels that way and its time you should as well.
Friday, March 16, 2012
Self Confident People Make a Mighty Nation
Self-confident people generate money
Self-confident people are filled with optimism and positive thoughts. They have an “I Can” attitude towards life and think it is possible to do great things. They are an asset to the organization they work for as they can be given tasks that demand greater responsibility and accountability. They hence keep up the quality, which in turn helps their employers to reap greater profits and thus contribute to the well being of both employees and the employer. People like Bill Gates have contributed millions of dollars to the economies of their countries and have been involved in lots of philanthropic work worldwide as well.
Self-confident people generate jobs
Self-confident people are natural risk takers and have enough courage to pursue their innovative dreams. Self-confident people often work very hard for the dreams they believe in and often end up as becoming successful entrepreneurs. They create a lot of jobs for others by their innovative business ventures. Though Edison faced a lot of difficulties as a child, his mother ensured that his self-confidence did not die. She made all efforts to encourage him and see him become successful. Today GE started by Edison is one of the world’s most competitive corporate organizations and is a hugely admired employer of thousands of people
Self-confident people make the nation self dependent
Entrepreneurs are a great catalyst of growth in any country. They do not sit idly waiting for the government reforms to come and pull them out. Instead they work out innovative ideas, which have commercial feasibility as well. They share the burden of the state by employing other people and giving them jobs. It saves the government lots of effort and money that could have been wasted in providing for the jobless youth. The money saved can then be routed to other developmental works for the benefit of all. The country does not need to borrow from the organisations like the World Bank and can deal with its developmental affairs independently.
Self-confident people present a better image of the nation
A nation of busy people conducting their day-to-day affairs is much better picture than having unemployed people taking on bad habits and creating a nuisance. Self-confident people are the face of any country, signifying optimism, hard work, determination and self-reliance. This helps the country to portray a picture of hope, dynamism, and growth to foreign investors who would like to conduct business activity and invest money in the country. This help create more and more jobs and a culture of hard work and achievement.
Self-confident people develop a habit of winning
Failure is an addiction and so is winning. It is just a matter of putting your efforts and thoughts in the right direction to become a winner and self-confident people do just that. A positive thought and self-confidence is what is needed to take an initiative, and a small achievement becomes the source of energy. This energy also gives a boost to the self-confidence of a person to take on a bigger leap and get successful. Thus every achievement breeds another initiative for yet another achievement!
Self-confident people help other people achieve their dreams
A person other than having the feeling of kindness and compassion for fellow human beings should also have enough resources or the ability to create resources to be able to help other people for the same. Self-confident people therefore are willing to give a helping hand to people and pull them up.
Self-confident people are an inspiration to others
Self-confident people succeed on both their professional and personal fronts. Self-confident people are respected and often spark others to perform as well and serve as a great inspiration for other people. People take a lesson from their struggles and their ability to turn failure into achievement.
Self-confident people strengthen the fabric of society
An idle mind is a devil’s workshop. Self-confident people in a way save the society from the devil by being busy and involved in constructive activities. People tend to get inspired from self-confident people and the general atmosphere becomes that of hard work and achievement. Such an environment is conducive for growth and development and self-confident people should be given every credit for the same. This overall movement raises the overall self-confidence of the nation and makes it more competitive and a confident participant in the world economic scenario.
Self-confident people are filled with optimism and positive thoughts. They have an “I Can” attitude towards life and think it is possible to do great things. They are an asset to the organization they work for as they can be given tasks that demand greater responsibility and accountability. They hence keep up the quality, which in turn helps their employers to reap greater profits and thus contribute to the well being of both employees and the employer. People like Bill Gates have contributed millions of dollars to the economies of their countries and have been involved in lots of philanthropic work worldwide as well.
Self-confident people generate jobs
Self-confident people are natural risk takers and have enough courage to pursue their innovative dreams. Self-confident people often work very hard for the dreams they believe in and often end up as becoming successful entrepreneurs. They create a lot of jobs for others by their innovative business ventures. Though Edison faced a lot of difficulties as a child, his mother ensured that his self-confidence did not die. She made all efforts to encourage him and see him become successful. Today GE started by Edison is one of the world’s most competitive corporate organizations and is a hugely admired employer of thousands of people
Self-confident people make the nation self dependent
Entrepreneurs are a great catalyst of growth in any country. They do not sit idly waiting for the government reforms to come and pull them out. Instead they work out innovative ideas, which have commercial feasibility as well. They share the burden of the state by employing other people and giving them jobs. It saves the government lots of effort and money that could have been wasted in providing for the jobless youth. The money saved can then be routed to other developmental works for the benefit of all. The country does not need to borrow from the organisations like the World Bank and can deal with its developmental affairs independently.
Self-confident people present a better image of the nation
A nation of busy people conducting their day-to-day affairs is much better picture than having unemployed people taking on bad habits and creating a nuisance. Self-confident people are the face of any country, signifying optimism, hard work, determination and self-reliance. This helps the country to portray a picture of hope, dynamism, and growth to foreign investors who would like to conduct business activity and invest money in the country. This help create more and more jobs and a culture of hard work and achievement.
Self-confident people develop a habit of winning
Failure is an addiction and so is winning. It is just a matter of putting your efforts and thoughts in the right direction to become a winner and self-confident people do just that. A positive thought and self-confidence is what is needed to take an initiative, and a small achievement becomes the source of energy. This energy also gives a boost to the self-confidence of a person to take on a bigger leap and get successful. Thus every achievement breeds another initiative for yet another achievement!
Self-confident people help other people achieve their dreams
A person other than having the feeling of kindness and compassion for fellow human beings should also have enough resources or the ability to create resources to be able to help other people for the same. Self-confident people therefore are willing to give a helping hand to people and pull them up.
Self-confident people are an inspiration to others
Self-confident people succeed on both their professional and personal fronts. Self-confident people are respected and often spark others to perform as well and serve as a great inspiration for other people. People take a lesson from their struggles and their ability to turn failure into achievement.
Self-confident people strengthen the fabric of society
An idle mind is a devil’s workshop. Self-confident people in a way save the society from the devil by being busy and involved in constructive activities. People tend to get inspired from self-confident people and the general atmosphere becomes that of hard work and achievement. Such an environment is conducive for growth and development and self-confident people should be given every credit for the same. This overall movement raises the overall self-confidence of the nation and makes it more competitive and a confident participant in the world economic scenario.
Self Confidence Makes You a Great Lover!
Love is a beautiful emotion, a gift of God, given to a chosen few. Not everybody get lots of love in his or her lifetime. However, many times lovers mess it up by not able to meet each other’s expectations by growing too possessive, by becoming overtly shy, by becoming unnecessarily skeptical and what not!
Most of the time, the culprit is within ourselves making us see things much bigger and magnified than they actually are and makes us overreact to events that could have been easily avoided. It is much easier to lose than to build something – especially when it comes to the matters of the heart. An ignorant and careless person is vulnerable to losing a lot, including his or her life partner as well. This article tells you some simple things that you can remember to help keep you from hurting your partner and keep your love life blossoming. Here are some habits of self-confident lovers.
Self-confident lovers are not jealous
If you are jealous of your partner, this is a sure indication that the foundations of love are not deep enough to withstand the wear and tear of time. Self confident lovers consider their partners as an extension of their own selves and feel happy if somebody has something good to say about their partners. There is no “yours” or “mine” in their relationship. It’s always “ours,” which forms the basis of their love. Most people get embarrassed or skeptical, or annoyed when someone makes a remark that “Your girl is so beautiful” or “Don’t you think your boyfriend has a talent of impressing girls around.” However, a confident man would say, “Yes. I know she is so beautiful and we are proud to be in love,” while a self-confident girl will shoot back – “Yes. He impressed me too!” Remember that your individual qualities now are a combined “quality pool” belonging to you both, and both partners must treat is as an asset. This is only possible when both of you are confident of each other’s love and commitment.
Self-confident lovers are more forgiving
Since self-confident people can maintain a cool and calm composure in the times of crisis, they are better at analyzing situations and are able to put themselves in their partner’s shoes. This way, they get their partner’s viewpoint and understand their behavior. In many instances, it happens that certain behavior of our partner annoys us or makes us skeptical. Lack of self-confidence can also make us think negatively. However, self-confident lovers believe in the policy of “forgive and forget” and can move on.
Self-confident lovers make their partner more secure and comfortable
In a relationship, looks do matter, but then the characteristics that matter even more are a sensible and rational nature, sense of humor, ability to handle tough situations and more. Self-confident lovers are the best places to look for these attributes. Their self confidence is contagious and they are promising professionals as well. They enjoy respect and camaraderie, and nurture positive and constructive thoughts. They seem to have the ability to push away problems and provide for their family. In this world where genuine love seems to be an urgent need to calm humanity, a self-confident lover makes us feel secure, comfortable and this life seems worth living for!
Self-confident lovers give their partner a great gift – the gift of independence!
Sometimes love rather than liberate us, actually binds us. So much so that a possessive partner would like to have all the details of our lives. Who are the people you work with? Who was that “Daniel” who gave you a call at 7 in the morning? Why do you want to have your personal car? Why do you have to wear makeup every time you go out? Why are you wearing this dress at this hour…and so on! Love, which was once the most beautiful emotion in our lives, which seemed to fill us with hope and enthusiasm, now seems to drain out all the energy from us. You feel as if you are bound to someone, answerable to someone and tethered to the wall with limited mobility. Love does not seem much more than slavery. Self-confident lovers realize the importance of independence. They let their partner fly and soar great heights, because they know that at the end of the day, it is to their arms their partner will return!
Most of the time, the culprit is within ourselves making us see things much bigger and magnified than they actually are and makes us overreact to events that could have been easily avoided. It is much easier to lose than to build something – especially when it comes to the matters of the heart. An ignorant and careless person is vulnerable to losing a lot, including his or her life partner as well. This article tells you some simple things that you can remember to help keep you from hurting your partner and keep your love life blossoming. Here are some habits of self-confident lovers.
Self-confident lovers are not jealous
If you are jealous of your partner, this is a sure indication that the foundations of love are not deep enough to withstand the wear and tear of time. Self confident lovers consider their partners as an extension of their own selves and feel happy if somebody has something good to say about their partners. There is no “yours” or “mine” in their relationship. It’s always “ours,” which forms the basis of their love. Most people get embarrassed or skeptical, or annoyed when someone makes a remark that “Your girl is so beautiful” or “Don’t you think your boyfriend has a talent of impressing girls around.” However, a confident man would say, “Yes. I know she is so beautiful and we are proud to be in love,” while a self-confident girl will shoot back – “Yes. He impressed me too!” Remember that your individual qualities now are a combined “quality pool” belonging to you both, and both partners must treat is as an asset. This is only possible when both of you are confident of each other’s love and commitment.
Self-confident lovers are more forgiving
Since self-confident people can maintain a cool and calm composure in the times of crisis, they are better at analyzing situations and are able to put themselves in their partner’s shoes. This way, they get their partner’s viewpoint and understand their behavior. In many instances, it happens that certain behavior of our partner annoys us or makes us skeptical. Lack of self-confidence can also make us think negatively. However, self-confident lovers believe in the policy of “forgive and forget” and can move on.
Self-confident lovers make their partner more secure and comfortable
In a relationship, looks do matter, but then the characteristics that matter even more are a sensible and rational nature, sense of humor, ability to handle tough situations and more. Self-confident lovers are the best places to look for these attributes. Their self confidence is contagious and they are promising professionals as well. They enjoy respect and camaraderie, and nurture positive and constructive thoughts. They seem to have the ability to push away problems and provide for their family. In this world where genuine love seems to be an urgent need to calm humanity, a self-confident lover makes us feel secure, comfortable and this life seems worth living for!
Self-confident lovers give their partner a great gift – the gift of independence!
Sometimes love rather than liberate us, actually binds us. So much so that a possessive partner would like to have all the details of our lives. Who are the people you work with? Who was that “Daniel” who gave you a call at 7 in the morning? Why do you want to have your personal car? Why do you have to wear makeup every time you go out? Why are you wearing this dress at this hour…and so on! Love, which was once the most beautiful emotion in our lives, which seemed to fill us with hope and enthusiasm, now seems to drain out all the energy from us. You feel as if you are bound to someone, answerable to someone and tethered to the wall with limited mobility. Love does not seem much more than slavery. Self-confident lovers realize the importance of independence. They let their partner fly and soar great heights, because they know that at the end of the day, it is to their arms their partner will return!
Thursday, March 15, 2012
Tips for Encouraging Self Confidence in Girls
Numerous studies show that girls' self-esteem and self-confidence tends to plummet after about age nine as girls enter puberty. Is there any way to promote and increase self esteem and confidence during the earlier years to help pave the way for this important transitional time? The good news is yes, there are things that can be done. Some of them you already know, but a few reminders can't hurt.
For one, limit television. Yes, we've all heard it before, and it's easier said than done, particularly when there are a number of things to be done. However, studies show that programming and advertising can have a negative affect on viewers. Beginning at very young ages, shows geared toward children are mixed with many advertising messages, some subtle, and some not so subtle. While we can't blame the media for everything, we can acknowledge that too much television may negatively affect our children's self esteem and confidence. Children who learn at a young age that food equals happiness, for example, may have problems with body image later in life. Ongoing messages that things are the solutions to problems only exaggerates feelings of low self worth if a child doesn't have the right things. As children age, the "things" can change into a perfect body, and not having the right things can translate into body image problems and other self-destructive behaviors.
Provide positive role models. As girls age, they become increasingly aware of how women around them act and respond to various situations. Women who stuff their anger or express it "sideways" show girls that it's not okay to be angry, stand up for oneself, and be open and honest about their feelings. Young girls learn from this behavior, and internal anger can express itself in feelings of low self-esteem and low confidence. Depression increases, and unexpressed anger can come out in very self-destructive ways, including eating disorders and substance abuse. Unfortunately, many women never learned how to express their feelings in an appropriate manner, because they themselves did not have positive role models. If this is an issue, consider seeking professional help, not only for your own sake, but for those of your children.
Encourage learning and education. Some studies show that girls with a strong educational background are less likely to run into trouble as teens. The more girls know, the better able they are to make decisions. It's also important to encourage learning in math and science. While this is improving, girls are still viewed as less likely to succeed in these areas. Encouragement in these learning areas cannot only promote increased self-confidence, but it can also prepare girls for the changing work environment that relies more and more on technology. Of course, this isn't to say that other areas of learning are less important; only that encouragement in these areas can help provide balance to an education that is still not quite equal.
Help young girls try new things and discover their talents. Learning what we are good at, and being encouraged to follow these directions, can greatly improve self-esteem and self confidence. When talents or dreams are dismissed, this can easily be perceived as a personal rejection. On the other hand, when girls are encouraged to pursue their interests and develop their talents, this gives the message that they are important. Girls who feel valued by their parents and other important figures in their life are less likely to seek validation from other sources, many of which are not the positive influences desired.
Helping your children develop a healthy self-esteem and self confidence is an ongoing process. They will face struggles, and parents and others need to help them figure out ways of dealing with tough times. But as you work on solutions together, you can help young girls develop independence and confidence.
For one, limit television. Yes, we've all heard it before, and it's easier said than done, particularly when there are a number of things to be done. However, studies show that programming and advertising can have a negative affect on viewers. Beginning at very young ages, shows geared toward children are mixed with many advertising messages, some subtle, and some not so subtle. While we can't blame the media for everything, we can acknowledge that too much television may negatively affect our children's self esteem and confidence. Children who learn at a young age that food equals happiness, for example, may have problems with body image later in life. Ongoing messages that things are the solutions to problems only exaggerates feelings of low self worth if a child doesn't have the right things. As children age, the "things" can change into a perfect body, and not having the right things can translate into body image problems and other self-destructive behaviors.
Provide positive role models. As girls age, they become increasingly aware of how women around them act and respond to various situations. Women who stuff their anger or express it "sideways" show girls that it's not okay to be angry, stand up for oneself, and be open and honest about their feelings. Young girls learn from this behavior, and internal anger can express itself in feelings of low self-esteem and low confidence. Depression increases, and unexpressed anger can come out in very self-destructive ways, including eating disorders and substance abuse. Unfortunately, many women never learned how to express their feelings in an appropriate manner, because they themselves did not have positive role models. If this is an issue, consider seeking professional help, not only for your own sake, but for those of your children.
Encourage learning and education. Some studies show that girls with a strong educational background are less likely to run into trouble as teens. The more girls know, the better able they are to make decisions. It's also important to encourage learning in math and science. While this is improving, girls are still viewed as less likely to succeed in these areas. Encouragement in these learning areas cannot only promote increased self-confidence, but it can also prepare girls for the changing work environment that relies more and more on technology. Of course, this isn't to say that other areas of learning are less important; only that encouragement in these areas can help provide balance to an education that is still not quite equal.
Help young girls try new things and discover their talents. Learning what we are good at, and being encouraged to follow these directions, can greatly improve self-esteem and self confidence. When talents or dreams are dismissed, this can easily be perceived as a personal rejection. On the other hand, when girls are encouraged to pursue their interests and develop their talents, this gives the message that they are important. Girls who feel valued by their parents and other important figures in their life are less likely to seek validation from other sources, many of which are not the positive influences desired.
Helping your children develop a healthy self-esteem and self confidence is an ongoing process. They will face struggles, and parents and others need to help them figure out ways of dealing with tough times. But as you work on solutions together, you can help young girls develop independence and confidence.
Self Confidence Make Ordinary People Achieve Extraordinary Feats
Preserve your self-confidence – don’t lose it!
Imagine the plight of a boy who had a hearing problem and so could not understand teacher’s instructions well. He was labeled a mentally weak child, who had no brains for studies and was thrown out of the school! This child was none other than the great Thomas Alva Edison. Now would you agree with the school that he was dumb? How is it possible, then, for a dumb child to patent more than 1000 inventions – more than the collective patents of all the scientists of his time? The credit goes to his mother for not letting him lose his self-confidence. Such is the power of self-confidence that inspires people to achieve great feats.
Einstein, after hearing about the way Mahatma Gandhi was determined to free his nation by using non-violence as a weapon, said that it would be difficult for future generations to imagine that such a man had walked down this planet. Gandhi’s self-confidence worked and his country was freed. Whether it is a patriot defending his country’s border, a swimmer giving all to get the medal for his country, a musician performing to a packed hall, a child reciting poem to her class, a fire-fighter struggling to save people, they all have something in common which makes them stand apart from other people. These people have an “I can” attitude towards life. They are full of self-confidence.
Develop self-confidence among your people
Corporations have been known to use tools like teamwork to inspire self-confidence in their people. People are the greatest asset an organization can have. Jack Welch the CEO of GE believed that the best idea wins, no matter where it comes from. So how do we get this best idea? It can only come from the people out there. So it is important to make every person feel himself to be an important part of the organization who has all the opportunity to learn, understand and develop the self-confidence to speak out his ideas. Ideas are a real treasure for a company to have, and it is self-confidence that brings great ideas to the forefront.
There are numerous examples in the history where a single person of courage changed the course of events. Be it Nelson Mandela, Mahatma Gandhi or Mother Teresa, all used their patience, perseverance, compassion and self-confidence to stay put on the path they had chosen.
Imagination – the cradle of self-confidence!
Our imagination is one of the greatest gifts that God have given us. Our imagination can stretch to any lengths. So much so that your own imagination has the power to make or break you. Though what you imagine yourself to be might be miles away from actual truth, it’s your imagination that dictates your feelings and emotions. What makes a successful person different from a failure is basically the way both of them think. If at a T-point you take the route to City A, you will reach City A. If you decide to go to the other direction to City B, you will reach City B. It’s as simple as that. You get what you want. So beware of your wants. You want what you imagine, so imagine great things for yourself.
People with low self-confidence usually imagine themselves as not doing well in their jobs, at home, in relationships and so on. Whereas a person with self-confidence would imagine himself getting a promotion in the next two years, having a family, kids, pay rise, holidays, owning a home and so on. So be a self-confident person and fantasize. Fantasizing is good for you. Fantasize about all what you would like to have for you. Meeting great people, shouldering great responsibilities, going places, and becoming the person you would like to become. This is a way to feed your mind with necessary inputs and your mind has the power to give solutions. Tell your mind the right things to do, and your mind will get you what you wanted. Believe it. It’s true!
Imagine the plight of a boy who had a hearing problem and so could not understand teacher’s instructions well. He was labeled a mentally weak child, who had no brains for studies and was thrown out of the school! This child was none other than the great Thomas Alva Edison. Now would you agree with the school that he was dumb? How is it possible, then, for a dumb child to patent more than 1000 inventions – more than the collective patents of all the scientists of his time? The credit goes to his mother for not letting him lose his self-confidence. Such is the power of self-confidence that inspires people to achieve great feats.
Einstein, after hearing about the way Mahatma Gandhi was determined to free his nation by using non-violence as a weapon, said that it would be difficult for future generations to imagine that such a man had walked down this planet. Gandhi’s self-confidence worked and his country was freed. Whether it is a patriot defending his country’s border, a swimmer giving all to get the medal for his country, a musician performing to a packed hall, a child reciting poem to her class, a fire-fighter struggling to save people, they all have something in common which makes them stand apart from other people. These people have an “I can” attitude towards life. They are full of self-confidence.
Develop self-confidence among your people
Corporations have been known to use tools like teamwork to inspire self-confidence in their people. People are the greatest asset an organization can have. Jack Welch the CEO of GE believed that the best idea wins, no matter where it comes from. So how do we get this best idea? It can only come from the people out there. So it is important to make every person feel himself to be an important part of the organization who has all the opportunity to learn, understand and develop the self-confidence to speak out his ideas. Ideas are a real treasure for a company to have, and it is self-confidence that brings great ideas to the forefront.
There are numerous examples in the history where a single person of courage changed the course of events. Be it Nelson Mandela, Mahatma Gandhi or Mother Teresa, all used their patience, perseverance, compassion and self-confidence to stay put on the path they had chosen.
Imagination – the cradle of self-confidence!
Our imagination is one of the greatest gifts that God have given us. Our imagination can stretch to any lengths. So much so that your own imagination has the power to make or break you. Though what you imagine yourself to be might be miles away from actual truth, it’s your imagination that dictates your feelings and emotions. What makes a successful person different from a failure is basically the way both of them think. If at a T-point you take the route to City A, you will reach City A. If you decide to go to the other direction to City B, you will reach City B. It’s as simple as that. You get what you want. So beware of your wants. You want what you imagine, so imagine great things for yourself.
People with low self-confidence usually imagine themselves as not doing well in their jobs, at home, in relationships and so on. Whereas a person with self-confidence would imagine himself getting a promotion in the next two years, having a family, kids, pay rise, holidays, owning a home and so on. So be a self-confident person and fantasize. Fantasizing is good for you. Fantasize about all what you would like to have for you. Meeting great people, shouldering great responsibilities, going places, and becoming the person you would like to become. This is a way to feed your mind with necessary inputs and your mind has the power to give solutions. Tell your mind the right things to do, and your mind will get you what you wanted. Believe it. It’s true!
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